心里好亂。 早上的心情和晚上的想法是不一樣的。 我到底要甚麼？嗨。。。

Everything starts anew. I know it didn't come back to square one. I have learnt something, experienced some things, and realized some things. I am glad I made a decision and wish me all the best in the new environtment,

什麼是人生目標。 我好想一個人永遠的靜一靜， 活在自己的世界里。每人能告訴我，我是誰。 我到底是誰。讓我離開大家吧。

跟你說話是一種辛苦，不是一種幸福。

You ask me if I love you
And I choke on my reply
Id rather hurt you honestly
Than mislead you with a lie
And who am I to judge you
In what you say or do
Im only just beginning
To see the real you

And sometimes when we touch
The honestys too much
And I have to close my eyes and hide
I want to hold you till I die
Till we both break down and cry
I want to hold you till the fear in me subsides

Romance and all its strategy
Leaves me battling with my pride
But through all the insecurity
Some tenderness survives
Im just another writer
Still trapped within my truth
A hesitant prize fighter
Still trapped within my youth

And sometimes when we touch
The honestys too much
And I have to close my eyes and hide
I want to hold you till I die
Till we both break down and cry
I want to hold you till the fear in me subsides

At times Id like to break you
And drive you to your knees
At times Id like to break through
And hold you endlessly
At times I understand you
And I know how hard you try
I watched while love commands you
And Ive watched love pass you by
At times I think were drifters
Still searching for a friend
A brother or a sister
But then the passion flares again

And sometimes when we touch
The honestys too much
And I have to close my eyes and hide
I want to hold ya till I die
Till we both break down and cry
I want to hold you till the fear in me subsides
Subsides

It strink untill I got nothing to say. 5 tablespoon of rice with vege is enough to get me bloated.One bun is more than enough. Slowly, if I can eat that much for a year, hope can shrink all my meat down.eat more fruits instead!

mad. just mad. I have gone mad. felt that I have wasted my PH. what happened, I asked myself. I have to struggle to get a message, a view, an opinion across to you.

sorry.

I love my job- as of now, hope i continue to enjoy it. I want to stay here for long. I am looking forward to brainstorming and create new ideas for client with the team. so fun to have ideas shared and doing lots of research and expand my general knowledge.

I know we are all busy recently, I don't want to give up, please sp please change your temper I beg you please...

and I had soupspoon that day.

It's the third day at new work place, didn't had much work to do yet for now. Feeling so weird to do nothing.

I love it here though.

So much more professionalism in the work and system. Yes, grass is greener on another pasture. I feel that now. No more SFF, finally. However I still look forward to this year sff, wondering will it really be at MBS and gonna turn out as wonderful as how they sell it out to the sponsors/partners. Shall see.

It's nearer to home, water doesn't have the rusty taste, artwork from creative is AWESOME. Bosses have high expectations, work has to be in order, nice colleagues (yes, not all place have politics!). Well so far so good, but I still don't know how will it be for the rest of my days here. Well spoc isn't that bad, colleagues are quite nice too and can go to work late late (but not now cause I saw spoc announce, saying that they have got stricter with the timing).

Anyway, all the best to me for my days here. Jiayou!

First day....




I am craving for soupspoon.

I don't know if it can work out for us... Exhausted. Mind and soul. Clueless about what's the next tiny creature thing that can crawl up and make us flip it around again. I don't know - that is what comes into my mind. Running away? Hide? Damn.

How I wish I can pause those nice moments. Just stop there and nothing else happens. That would be nice.


Few days ago....
I got a bad bad dream, its really hard to loss someone you love, or get mistaken and hated by the one you love. I dreamt that my mum hates me and mistaken me and see me as someone who has no pride and respect. She makes the whole world look down on me, and wants to "divorce" me. I cried so hard felt so hurt that my heart sank. Its mental and soul torture. Have always been getting this recently.


Sigh am not having pms, or perhaps I should say I have pms 24hrs a day, 7 days a week.


I need sleeping pills.......

Didn't continue my blog on TW trip... wanted to but (alright lots of excuses starts coming up). Boo anyway, just done with Lasik. Still have my shades on so haven really feel the convinience yet. Emo recently. Sigh, guess my PSM comes every day... WHO SAYS LASIK IS NOT PAINFUL?!?! It's hell pain for me, not the procedure of flipping the cornea upo but is the pressure from the machine to get my eye balls up, gosh its terrible. The aftermath "bruise" from the pressure of sucking my eyeball. Not that bad though hope it gets away soon.

Very first meal that I cooked for myself in my life. Looks good? Nah, its not cooked at all, I threw back to the pot to cook for another 30minutes. (stir till I got no appetite to eat already....)

PS: How I wish my bf can cook for me instead.....Paranoid. Needs 24hr protection. (bath, brush, eat .....) Out with bro the next day after first check up. Anyway dear pei-ed me too.

Taken on our second anni.... makan @ Aston Centrepoint

HAHA Drunk face but am not drunk. My first time drink till pulk. It shall be the last time I promised (to myself)

enjoying myself at Kino... (cool right!)

Nice car, love it.

Thanks uncle for fetching us to the airport early in the Sunday Morning.

*lovely red and orange luggage, but poor thing being chunked and scratched when threw into the airplane.

First night we head to Kee Lung, night market for food. The tour guide told us is walkable distance back to hotel but it seems like a 15mintues walk!




I got a huge shock when I saw my bro hugging this.

1st night


1st breakfast... it was OK...

He is forever trying to connect to FB..... upstairs downstairs inside outside, EVERYWHERE.

LOVE this photo of mine. Natural.Agree?



Some village... (sry I don't even know where I am...)


This disturbing place. Make me feel like pulking after eating(almost pulk). The smell the environment too oldschool. My brother feels that too.

.......

Next stop!
Toilet break. Some nice color fruit loli ice.
Bing nan tree if am not wrong



To be continue....

TW TW isn't bad after all...

Now is the second trip. Even though till now I still prefer free and easy, but hopefully the next few days will be full of excitement. More shopping!! Want to buy back a lot of food from here for my dear friends. Food I meant lorbak peng, milk tea.. not pineapple tarts!

I shouldn't choose TW TW, if not the year will be BKK KR....


sigh.


Not looking forward to it at all.....




Life can be better, if I...

It is too late to change my mind now, blame it on myself for not sounding out what I want.


Too bad.


Just too bad for me.


sigh.

too concerned what to blog.